I have been married to my husband for over 8 years. I like that I can say "over" since our 8 year anniversary was in December. It makes me feel older and wiser, even though the actual digit is still a single number! I still have "arguments" with my husband, we still "disagree" about things and even after 8 years of marriage and 31 years of life (I have double digits there) I still call my mom when things aren't going right with Ross. And I don't just mean he left the toilet seat up, went out for a weekend with his buddies and left me home with kids, I mean: Where is my life going?, Is he still the right person for me?, and Are we going to grow old together? kinda questions/fears/vents. My mom always gives me the same advice: Don't have any EXPECTATIONS of Ross and accept him. Don't EXPECT him to change because you don't want to. Don't EXPECT him to bring home flowers, by them yourself. Don't EXPECT him to read your mind when he doesn't even read his own! Don't EXPECT him to do everything exactly the way you have pictured in your head because then you ARE EXPECTING him to fail. No Expectations. Easier said than done. But RIGHT!
As I was planning our last bible study on having a loving, intimate relationship with God, I thought how is that possible. I say I love God. I say God loves me. But how do I know. I don't always feel that complete connection I think I should. He isn't always the person I turn to first when there is a problem, even though I know I should. He doesn't always answer me or show Himself to me when I need Him. I can say the words but I don't always see the actions. And then it hit me: when you are achieving true intimacy with someone you are completely giving yourself to them. Everything about you is put on the table. You bear your complete soul: the good, the bad, the pretty and the ugly. All of it is out there. And you hope your partner does the same to you. You take everything they have and love them for and in spite of it.
The same is with God. You give yourself completely but you shouldn't expect anything in return. We are blessed to have a relationship with God and He told us many times in the bible that he is always there for us and will take care of us. If we lose the EXPECTATIONS that He needs to prove his love to us by answering prayers in a certain and timely manner, by fixing our lives for us when they take a turn for the bad and that he needs to show us in physical ways daily how he loves us, then we can have the loving, intimate relationship we yearn for with God. We will learn to take Him for everything he is and love and cherish him just as he takes us and loves and cherishes us.
Relationships are hard work and our relationship with God is no different. As we nurture and grow our relationships with spouses, children, friends and family members we must also take that care in our relationship with God. And in time it isn't work anymore...it just is. The loving and intimate relationship we have been craving is just a part of us. A part of our heart, our soul and our might.
"For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give your a future with hope. Then when you call upon me and come and pray to me, I will hear you. When you search for me, you will find me; if you seek me with all you hear, I will let you find me, says the Lords, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you fall all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, says the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile." ( Jeremiah 29:11-45) This is part of the letter Jeremiah wrote to the exiles in Babylon letting them know that God was still watching out for them and he was still there for them and the should continue the live their lives how He has asked and when the exile is over he will come back for them. Even when we don't feel God surrounding us every day and every minute as we nurture our relationship with Him we will one day come to the understanding that he is always with us. Continuing to grow and nurture your faith journey will bring you closer to that understanding.
What are ways you grow and nurture your love, intimacy and understanding of God?
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