Grace Under...the Holidays!

Thanksgiving has always been my favorite Holiday.  Many people who know me would probably guess my birthday ( I do think it is a month long celebration) or Christmas because I love opening presents (there doesn't even have to be anything in the box, I just like opening them) but they would be wrong.  Every year when the leaves begin to change I look forward to the smell of Fall and the smell of a big turkey.  I hate that Thanksgiving comes at the end of the month and I have to wait soooo long to cook a wonderful meal that really only last about 20 minutes, at the most!  Apart from the dinner and the leftovers for days, I love Thanksgiving because that was the one day a year that my family would come together and spend the day cooking, cleaning, talking, watching football, playing football and getting stuffed with pie!  My dad is older than his siblings and had children many years before them so many times Thanksgiving was the one day a year where we would get to see everyone in one place.  I loved it and I really want that for my children. 

Now that I live in NC Thanksgiving is usually just Me, Ross and the boys. My parents are in NC for Thanksgiving this year but my mother has MS and if there is even a sniffle in the house they won't come. I have small children and it is November so the probability of no sniffles is very slim.  Last Friday, when I was told I couldn't visit the family farm because I had been sick, I was less then kind in the way I spoke to my mom and as I was speaking I knew I was telling the truth but did it really need to be that way?  Did I really need to point out that it was ridiculous that I would contaminate all the air around the whole 55 acres? Did I need to mention that we had decided to leave our kids to another family member (in the event of our death) because I didn't want a nanny raising my kids since, my mother couldn't be around sick kids (as I write these words I am still ashamed they ever came out of my mouth).  No, I didn't need to mention any of that but the idea of being banned from the farm was very frustrating and while I said all those "wonderful" things to my mother, she didn't say anything back.  She just continued the conversation as though I had said nothing.  Even when I called to apologize about 5 minutes later she told me there was nothing to apologize for.  That was Grace. 

I tie this to my thoughts on Thanksgiving because I really can't imagine not spending Thanksgiving with my parents but most of all I am Thankful because my mother reminded me that while we THINK we need to get our thoughts out at the exact moment, sometimes it is better to really think things through.  I knew the moment I got off the phone I was wrong.  I knew the moment I spoke the words, I was wrong.  I really wished in that moment I had God on speed dial so he could have whispered to me "Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." (Proverbs 12:18).  My words were reckless but in my mother's grace I was able to heal and forgive myself.  In Becoming More Than A Good Bible Study Girl, Lysa mentioned, "Grace doesn't give me a free pass to act out how I feel, with no regard to His commands. Rather his grace gives me consolation in the moment, with a challenge to learn from this situation and become more mature in the future.  Grace is the sugar that helps the bitter pills of confession and repentance go down without choking.". I was humbled when I got off the phone with my mom because through her God reminded me that even though I was upset and hurt I didn't really have the right to speak to my mom the way I did and I hope the lesson I learned is that when I am in her position I will be able to have the grace she did and let someone else off the hook.

As we go into to the holiday season surrounded the by the family we love, yet drives us crazy, as we stand in the long lines trying to buy that perfect Christmas present and as something goes wrong with the meal that took hours to make...how you do you propose we handle the different situations/conversations that will surely come our way, with the grace of God?